Trials and tribu­la­tions walkthrough

Yes, the pain is deep, loos­ing rep­u­ta­tion, betrayal espe­cially when the other per­son believes you’ve betrayed them because God tells you to fol­low him and not them.  Even if they believe you made a promise but the other per­son did not hear the other part I said many years ago that when I got to busy for God, I was going to lay it down and man God made me live up to that.

Unfor­tu­nately, me leav­ing was a betrayal to the other per­son.  I have to obey His ways and many times he takes peo­ple apart and sets them on other paths.  Many times you have no under­stand­ing why but did Abra­ham under­stand when the Lord told him to leave and go to a strange land?

Through tri­als and tribu­la­tions of all this, the pain, the hurt and the loss, I had to see what Jesus went through when He hung on the cross to give us life spir­i­tu­ally as well as phys­i­cally.  He came to over­come and I can over­come accord­ing to John 16:33John 16:33
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
33 These things I have spo­ken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribu­la­tion: but be of good cheer; I have over­come the world.  

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“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribu­la­tion. But take heart; I have over­come the world.”

Not only that but the Lord is pro­duc­ing per­se­ver­ance in me in accor­dance to Romans 5:3Romans 5:3
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
3 And not only so, but we glory in tribu­la­tions also: know­ing that tribu­la­tion wor­keth patience;  

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“More than that, we rejoice in our suf­fer­ings, know­ing that suf­fer­ing pro­duces endurance,…”

When you are in a place of prepa­ra­tion and heal­ing and restora­tion and the wait­ing, you can­not be anx­ious but the Lord will guard your heart and mind from the attacks of the enemy or temp­ta­tions accord­ing to Philip­pi­ans 4:6–7Philip­pi­ans 4:6–7
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
6 Be care­ful for noth­ing; but in every thing by prayer and sup­pli­ca­tion with thanks­giv­ing let your requests be made known unto God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which pas­seth all under­stand­ing, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.  

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“Do not be anx­ious about any­thing, but in every­thing by prayer and sup­pli­ca­tion with thanks­giv­ing let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which sur­passes all under­stand­ing, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

We serve such an awe­some God of the Lord most high and we can count those tri­als and tribu­la­tions as joy accord­ing to James 1:2James 1:2
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
2 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temp­ta­tions; temp­ta­tion: or, tri­als  

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“Count it all joy, my broth­ers, when you meet tri­als of var­i­ous kinds,”

It is not easy to give up some­thing you love, birthed, and given your heart to and then have to lay it all down.  Not only that but give all the money, equip­ment and BIH.  I gave it all up accord­ing to the Lord Most High.   Some of the min­istries have opin­ions of me that are not true.  They don’t know what took place but that is part of God has to be your all so that you are not con­cerned about what oth­ers think.

In the past, I would try to fix things to only make it worse.  It is bet­ter to leave it alone and trust God.  God knows the truth and that should count.  We get in trou­ble when we try to fix our rep­u­ta­tion with man.  Could it be an idol — loved by all man?

Man always ruins oth­ers rep­u­ta­tions and mine cer­tainly was through sev­eral avenues of peo­ple — fiery darts. Praise the Lord!

I had to see these were fiery darts of test­ing accord­ing to 1 Peter 4:121 Peter 4:12
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
12 Beloved, think it not strange con­cern­ing the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing hap­pened unto you:  

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“Beloved, do not be sur­prised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though some­thing strange were hap­pen­ing to you.”

Fiery darts come from peo­ple who are the clos­est to you — friends, fam­ily, min­istries, etc.  Again I had to remem­ber Jesus on the cross say­ing Father for­give them for they do not know what they are doing.  I look that God is test­ing my heart and my reac­tions.  I’m for­ever grate­ful of BIH for my heal­ing, for the min­istry in Lewisville for lov­ing me and accept­ing me and point­ing me in the right direc­tion.  I can truly say I care for all these peo­ple regard­less if they think of me on earth.  Their opin­ions do not matter.

As long as I know I’ve done right and areas it was not han­dled I went to the Lord for for­give­ness and know I’m for­given and move forward.

The enemy wants to stop you and keep you in the past,  but I’m mov­ing for­ward to the things of the Lord even though I would rather be a bump on the log.  I would have to say these tri­als has given me a deeper love for peo­ple in God’s way of love.

Isa­iah 43:19Isa­iah 43:19
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilder­ness, and rivers in the desert.  

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¹⁹ Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilder­ness, and rivers in the desert. ”

I love peo­ple, not what they can do for me or ful­fill any­thing in me but because my Lord Jesus Christ loves them as well.

Even though I felt weak and bro­ken I knew I could do all things accord­ing to 2 Corinthi­ans 12:92 Corinthi­ans 12:9
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
9 And he said unto me, My grace is suf­fi­cient for thee: for my strength is made per­fect in weak­ness. Most gladly there­fore will I rather glory in my infir­mi­ties, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.  

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But he said to me,

“My grace is suf­fi­cient for you, for my power is made per­fect in weak­ness.” There­fore I will boast all the more gladly of my weak­nesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. “  That is a promise when we feel weak, bro­ken, bleed­ing inside, etc. we are made per­fect in weak­ness because then it is more of God and me more out of the way.  That is how we are sup­pose to look at weakness.”

I would have to say my faith was being tested and many times just wanted to give up and part of me just wanted to dis­ap­pear or be absorbed by the air and not exist.  But, I knew that is what the Lord did not want but for me to get back up and go for­ward even in my weak­ness and to count it all joy accord­ing to James 1:2James 1:2
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
2 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temp­ta­tions; temp­ta­tion: or, tri­als  

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“Count it all joy, my broth­ers, when you meet tri­als of var­i­ous kinds, for you know that the test­ing of your faith pro­duces stead­fast­ness. And let stead­fast­ness have its full effect, that you may be per­fect and com­plete, lack­ing in noth­ing. If any of you lacks wis­dom, let him ask God, who gives gen­er­ously to all with­out reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubt­ing, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is dri­ven and tossed by the wind. … ”

My faith has been strength­ened.  I’m not the same per­son.  It now takes a lot to take me down.  I see God in all sit­u­a­tions and that he is work­ing it out regard­less if I can see it or not like Heb. 11:1Heb. 11:1
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
11 ¹ Now faith is the sub­stance of things hoped for, the evi­dence of things not seen. sub­stance: or, ground, or, con­fi­dence  

WP-Bible plu­gin — I can­not go by what I see but what I can­not see and trust God’s word and praise him for the good result even though it is not happening.

That means stand­ing strong and not being fright­ened.  You can­not be afraid of your ene­mies.  When you have a min­istry, you have ene­mies.  Just like Joshua, I was going into new ter­ri­tory and can­not be afraid accord­ing to Joshua 1:9Joshua 1:9
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
9 Have not I com­manded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, nei­ther be thou dis­mayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whith­er­so­ever thou goest.  

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“Have I not com­manded you? Be strong and coura­geous. Do not be fright­ened, and do not be dis­mayed, for the Lord your God is with you wher­ever you go.”

I really hope this helps some­one who is in the min­istry and being attacked with fiery darts to not give up.  Because all these things are tests of faith accord­ing to 1 Peter 1:71 Peter 1:7
Eng­lish: King James Ver­sion (1611) — KJV
7 That the trial of your faith, being much more pre­cious than of gold that per­isheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and hon­our and glory at the appear­ing of Jesus Christ:  

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“So that the tested gen­uine­ness of your faith—more pre­cious than gold that per­ishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the rev­e­la­tion of Jesus Christ. ”

Part 1 — Tri­als and Tribulations

Part 3 Tri­als and Tribulations